Tuesday, July 7, 2009

More Creative Censorship From the One Million Moms

The One Million Moms have taken a short break from their crusade against The Secret Life of the American Teenager to protest some new ads from Carl's Jr./Hardee's. Here's the action alert (emphasis mine):

Hardee's and Carl's Jr. (CKE Restaurants) will never learn. They are back at it again with several more disgusting ads.

Though this time Hardees ad isn't visually explicit, the words and innuendo are loaded with s-xual nuance. It features their new "Biscuit holes." In the ad, various customers individually name them using such verbiage as B holes, A holes, dingle balls, and biscatles (as in testicles).

Sister company, Carl's Jr., has just launched its newest in a series of raunchy s-x-laden ads.

In review:

(1) Hardee's is a hamburger business catering to family yet they
consistently have used s-x to try to sell its product.

(2) In 2003, Hardee's (Carl's Jr.) featured Hugh Hefner as a poster celebrity.

(3) Hardee's also used an er-tic ad featuring a mechanical bull and a scantily clad female.

(4) In 2005, Hardee's used a pornographic ad featuring Paris Hilton exerting sleazy movements to market hamburgers at their "family" restaurants.

TAKE ACTION: Send an email to CKE President Andrew Puzder. We encourage to edit the letter provided and tell him, in your own words, what you think of his company's advertisements. Take an additional step by contacting your local store manager or owner, asking them to use their influence to stop the offensive ads.

We don't have much to say about the actual protest this time - we don't get Hardee's commercials here so we don't really see them enough to get super annoyed by them, although they do seem pretty stupid. (Also, we do have to applaud Hardee's for managing that special flavor of offensive that pisses off conservative women and feminists.) We're too busy laughing at how out of control OMM's word censorship is getting.

Just like before, the One Million Moms refuse to use the word sex, so they say s-x instead. So now I feel dirty even typing it. Sex. Sex sex sex. Sex! Okay, sorry. Anyway, the 'no sex' rule creates some true spelling comedy when they decide to use variations of the word, like "s-xual" (which looks like the name of some kind of robot) and "s-x-laden" (which is just hyphen overload and makes me think they might as well have written "s-x-l-d-n" and turned it into a fun 'guess the naughty word!' game). Keep in mind that they're doing this in email alerts written by adults for adults, and more specifically, written by moms for moms. So, leaving aside a very small percentage of celibate adoptive parents and immaculate conceptions, we're talking about women who have all had sex but apparently can't deal with seeing the word on their computer screen.

Since they can't even type out the word "sex", it's no surprise that they're horrible at trying to describe anything that's supposed to be sexy. The result is great stuff like when they explain that the commercial Paris Hilton did for Carl's Jr. is offensive because it features Paris "exerting sleazy movements". Who talks like that? Oh, right, people who write "s-x" instead of sex, that's who.

But my absolute favorite part of this has to be the reference to a recent "er-tic ad" from Hardee's. For a second I was confused and thought that maybe Hardee's had produced some sort of ablist commercial making fun of someone with a rare facial tic disorder. I quickly realized that it was just the One Million Moms being ridiculous and refusing to type the word erotic. Really, OMM? Not only is this stupid, it's also totally arbitrary. They'll say "raunchy", "testicles", "scantily clad", "pornographic", and "sleazy", but they won't say "sex" or "erotic"? I'm sure there's some very sound logic behind that. And speaking of arbitrary, why not e-otic or ero-ic or -rotic or erot-c? This is all so complicated.

Wait a second. I just noticed that in their old action alert on The Cougar, it was "s*x", and now it's "s-x". I wonder if that's some sort of secret conservative mom code or alert system or something, like maybe the middle symbol lets you know how offensive it is. If we start seeing references to s~x or s#x or s^x, we'll know we're really in trouble.

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