Thursday, August 27, 2009

80s Remake Fantasy Casting

We've been watching a lot of 80's movies lately. Not sure why... Maybe the TV networks are just feeling a bit nostalgic for fun music and bad fashion, who knows? Either way, we've been enjoying it, but it's also given us a lot to think about. So many classic movies from our childhood have been - or are about to be - remade. It definitely brings up mixed feelings.

On the one hand, we love these movies... who wouldn't want to relive them? On the other hand, there really only a small chance that anyone will possibly be able to do these films justice. Yes, we realize that a lot of these films actually totally sucked, but they sucked in a good way. It's very hard to reproduced the correct ratio of cheesy-to-awesome. There have been a lot of remake rumors over the years. Some totally great (like Tron: Legacy) and some totally terrifying (like an Adventures in Babysitting remake starring Raven-Symone). Some of the choices are just puzzling... like reinventing Fame as a squeaky clean teen flick or casting Chace Crawford in the new Footloose. Sure he's pretty, but can he dance?

We admit we were a little disappointed when we heard the news that Zac Efron was taking a pass on the Footloose remake. He seemed perfect to fill Kevin Bacon's shoes. But then the other day we were watching TV and realized that there is a much better 80's remake idea for him: Teen Wolf! No, really.

Unlike some classic 80's flicks like Weird Science or Red Dawn that just would not translate to our 21st century world, Teen Wolf is a story so timeless it could take place in any decade. Plus we know how much people love to cast Zac Efron as a high school basketball star. (And really, if there was ever anything more implausible than Zac Efron as a basketball star, it was Michael J. Fox as one).

They even almost look alike:

Actually, after writing this, we googled "Zac Efron Teen Wolf" on a whim and realized that we're not so far off - there is a remake in the works and he is being considered. (We are always right on top of this shit). He probably won't take the part, but we're keeping our fingers crossed. We'd also throw James Lafferty from One Tree Hill into the cast too - he's cute and he has years of experience playing a high school basketball star and dealing with totally implausible plotlines.

There are other 80's movies we'd secretly love to see remade (but of course we'd claim to be totally offended if anyone actually attempted to redo them)... like Little Darlings. We all know that Miley Cyrus is going to want to take some more serious movie roles after Hannah Montana... what could be better than losing her virginity at summer camp? America's favorite robot Kristen Stewart can co-star, because after Twilight she deserves a movie with some actual sex in it. It's at least got to be a better movie than Rhinestone 2: Still Rhiney.

And while I really hope that the rumors of Miley starring in a Girls Just Wanna Have Fun remake are totally, utterly false... I would love to see that movie remade. Screw Miley - if they're going to insist on going Disney, I'd rather see BFFs Selena Gomez and Demi Lovato co-star. How cute would that be!? Or maybe Gossip Girl besties Blake Lively and Leighton Meester.


Speaking of Blake Lively, did you know that her older sister Robyn was the star of Teen Witch? Which means that Blake would have to appear in any remake - such as the one rumored to be starring Disney darling Ashley Tisdale. It's the law.

And since it's a little known fact that we will watch almost anything starring Amanda Bynes (can't exactly explain why we love her, but we just do)... who else would we cast in a fantasy production of Sixteen Candles? She was already adorable in She's the Man (which, although not technically a remake, had pretty much the same premise as Just One of the Guys). In fact, she could re-team with co-star Channing Tatum as Jake Ryan. Not too many of today's current "hotties" are actually hot enough to pull off that kind of role and luckily there wouldn't be too many lines to confuse him. But they would have to add in an extra scene or two where Chan takes his shirt off. Please...

There are other 80's flicks that Hollywood is already attempting to remake. We're not quite sure if our reaction is horror, morbid curiosity, or breathless anticipation. Probably a combination. Some of these include Ferris Bueller's Day Off (the proposed script is actually for a sequel, with Matthew Broderick reprising his role as Ferris 20 years later) and Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure (without George Carlin can it possibly be any good?)

There's one classic that we hope never gets made: The Breakfast Club. There's just no way they could ever do the original justice. But the more we thought about it, the more we wondered which of today's young stars would fill the shoes of the infamous brain, athlete, basket case, princess and criminal... and we came up with some hilarious ideas.

  • They could do an all Gossip Girl recast: Penn Badgley, Chace Crawford, Taylor Momsen, Leighton Meester, and Ed Westwick (respectively)
  • Or One Tree Hill: Bethany Joy Galeotti, James Lafferty, Hilarie Burton, Sophia Bush and Chad Michael Murray
  • Or a 90210 version: Michael Steger, Dustin Milligan, Jessica Stroup, Shenae Grimes, and Matt Lanter.
  • How about the Secret Life (you know we love any excuse to mention this show): Ken Baumannn, Greg Finley, India Eisley, Megan Park and Daren Kagasoff.
  • Or even a High School Musical one: Lucas Grabeel, Zac Efron, Vanessa Hudgens, Ashley Tisdale, and Corbin Bleu.
On second thought... no. Let's just forget about that one. What are some of your favorite 80's flicks you'd like to see remade... and your fantasy casts?

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