Friday, October 11, 2013

The Vampire Diaries: True Lies

The second episode of the new season 5 of The Vampire Diaries opens up with boring exposition from Bonnie, as she tells the viewers Jeremy about how Silas-Stefan killed her dad and mind-controlled the town last week. Then she guilt-trips Jeremy about being dead, "What are you gonna do? Hug me? You can't. You can't touch me and I can't touch you because I'm dead." (Dude, it's not his fault you're dead and he's not. You made the choice to use magic to bring him back to life, don't make him feel extra shitty about it.) Bonnie tells Jeremy that Silas wants Katherine and everyone in town is going to be on the lookout for her thanks to his mind-control but that whatever he wants with her "you can't let him have it". This dude's powerful enough to mind-control an entire town at once, but Jeremy is supposed to be able do anything to stop Silas from finding Katherine? Okay.

Elsewhere, Katherine is having a rough time and another bad hair day. Someone stops on the street to see if she needs help but then realizes "you look just like Elena Gilbert". (I love Katherine's response "I'm much prettier".) They fight and Katherine punches her and knocks her out. Katherine is about to get away when Matt shows up with a gun pointed at her.

Then the scene cuts to a really dumb dream of Stefan and Elena at a lakeside picnic. Then Elena starts to cough up water as we are reminded that Stefan is actually deep underwater in the lake, drowning and re-drowning over and over again.

Back at college, there's a little memorial to Megan (Elena and Caroline's dead roommate). Caroline expresses exactly what we're all thinking "college students are so dramatic. She was on campus for like one day. She couldn't have made that many friends." They are still trying to figure out what Megan's deal was... why she has vervaine-laced water and a photo of Elena's dad on her phone. Megan's death has officially been ruled a suicide and there is no mention of the "gaping vampire bites on her neck" in the medical report. Elena has switched their class schedule so they can take a microbiology class with Dr. Maxfield because he's the guy who signed off on Megan's cause of death. They're going to get to the bottom of things!

Back in Mystic Falls Damon is trying to convince the sheriff to dredge the quarry and search for Stefan's body because "if I'm gonna take over my doppelganger's life, why wouldn't I dump him where it's big and deep and no one would find him". Jeremy calls Damon to tell him that Matt found Katherine and he tells him to hold onto her and keep her away from Silas. Katherine laments how she's been here before, she's the leverage, she's the one who everybody wants. Oh poor poor Katerina.

Tyler is still M.I.A. (come on CW, bring back Michael Trevino!) so Jesse (the cute guy from the frat party) flirts with Caroline in microbiology class and says he hopes she will be at that evening's bonfire. Professor Maxfield is kind of a dick. He shames them for being freshman trying to take his class and makes them go down the hall to Bio 101. Elena recounts the story to Damon on the phone when Silas-Stefan appears. Before Damon can warn her that it's not really Stefan, Silas-Stefan uses his mind-control to make Elena hang up the phone. He continues the charade of being Stefan and tells Elena that Jeremy got expelled, got in a fight with Damon and ran away... He takes her phone and asks her for information on where Jeremy might be going. Someone has said they spotted him by Route 9 so she suggests an old campsite they used to go to as kids.

Back on Route 9, Jeremy and Matt stop for gas and let Katherine go to the bathroom. She's sick so she also asks for aspirin and cold medicine too. (Poor Katherine is really not enjoying being human.) The gas station attendant spots her and Matt has to beat him up to stop him.

Damon shows up at the dorms and walks in on Caroline in a towel. "Damon! Knock!" "Caroline! No one cares!" He tells her what's really going on with Stefan and Silas-Stefan. They need to find Elena! Damon finds Silas-Stefan, but he won't tell Damon what he did with Elena because it will "ruin the fun". Uh oh. Caroline scolds Damon for not telling the truth in the first place. "Gee thanks Caroline. Your hindsight is invaluable in this situation."

Jesse sees Elena at the bonfire and she asks him about "Professor Dickfield". They go to get more firewood together and he tells her that there's a rumor that he's part of a secret society on campus. They supposedly meet a few times a week at Whitmore house "but you didn't hear that from me". Then Damon comes in and knocks him out.

Back at the campsite Katherine is still bitching about being human: "I've survived childbirth, the death of my entire family, and 500 years of running from an immortal hybrid. You can understand why I'm a little upset that I'm on the verge of being defeated by a sinus infection!" Silas-Stefan shows up and tries to use mind-control to tell Matt "you can't talk, you can't scream" but Matt says "yeah, actually I can... Jeremy RUN!" Silas-Stefan asks the same question we're all asking "how come I can't get inside your head?" He grabs him by the face and sees what Nadia and her friend did to him last episode. "Somebody's already in there. Why are you watching me Traveler?" Silas-Stefan snaps Matt's neck and he falls to the ground.

Luckily he was wearing the Gilbert ring. He wakes up and sees Jeremy and Katherine run by but they can't hear or see him. Bonnie is there to explain that he's on 'the other side'. ("Freaky isn't it?") The Gilbert ring brought him there when he died, temporarily. To go back he has to reconnect with his body. "Each time you die you wake up farther and farther from it. You wander the other side until you find it." And now he knows that Bonnie is dead.

Elena brings Damon back to her dorm and starts to strip his clothes off. He's trying to resist when she forces the bottled vervaine-water down his throat and he starts to cough and get sick. Then she ties him to the chair. "Silas got into your head, didn't he?" Apparently, he told her to get him alone, weaken him and then kill him. She tries to resist it... even going to far as to stab herself in the leg. The problem is that her anger at Damon is the trigger and she can't help but be angry at him because he's been lying to her.



Caroline takes care of Jess and and apologizes that Damon "went agro" on him. They have a little moment when she admits that she has a boyfriend and they talk about how relationships change when you go away to college (he had a similar issue with an ex who cheated on him while he was away at school). We see romance in their future, since we know Tyler isn't coming back.

Jeremy wants to go back and look for Matt, but Katherine tells him that the reason she survived for so long was that she never looked back. He tells her that's why people treat her like an object and not a person. Meanwhile Bonnie and Matt are still having a romantic Other Side stroll looking for his body. He tells her "you don't have to pretend like it's okay" and that he's so sorry about her dad dying - and her dying - and hugs her. Are these the beginnings of a Matt-Bonnie semi-romance? Why not, they're pretty much running out of pairings that haven't already been done.

Jeremy goes back for Matt and Stefan-Silas finds him. "If my best friend died, I'd at least pretend to cry, which leads me to believe that he's not really dead". Silas-Stefan can't read or control Jeremy's mind either because he's a hunter ("Plus I work out") so they fight over Matt's dead body. He's about to kill Jeremy when Katherine shows up and shoots Silas-Stefan.

Damon is still trying to talk Elena down from her rage so she can resist the compulsion to kill him. She turns on the gas and tries to light a match while Damon tries to talk her down from it. He tries to help by making her think about Stefan and describe the feelings she's been having lately. Elena tells him she can sense Stefan - he's scared, he's lonely, he's in a lot of pain and "we have to find him" - and then realizes that the rage is gone. Just then Caroline walks in, sees the crazy scene and says "I think we need to set some ground rules for when boyfriends come to visit".

Matt finally finds his body (Jeremy and Katherine had moved it and were waiting with him to wake up)."So if this happens every time I die with the Gilbert ring, the second I go back I'm just going to forget about all of this?" He tells her that she and Jeremy can't keep her death a secret anymore." He tells her she'll never be able to deal with her father's death if she doesn't deal with her own and then goes back into his body. "What the hell happened?"

Bonnie appears to Jeremy and admits that she's not okay. He tells her that he's there for her, no matter what she needs.

Stefan-Silas goes to the gas station to drink some blood and finds Nadia and her "Traveler" friend. He says they want him back in his tomb, sealed away for eternity. "That's what the Travelers have always wanted," says Nadia, as she stabs her partner "luckily for you I've never really considered myself one." She tells Silas t look inside her mind and see that she has her own agenda. "Yes, I see that you do."

Elena is heading back to Mystic Falls to look for Damon (and Bonnie) while Caroline stays on campus. As she's about to leave, Professor Maxfield says to her "I didn't think Elena Gilbert would give up so easily." He apologizes for being a hardass earlier and explains that he knew of her dad. "He's a legend around here. Brilliant. I've studied all his research." She asks if her dad forged death certificates too and he tells her to come by his office tomorrow to chat, but she mentions that she's got other important things on her plate. He says "let me know when that plate clears."

Damon: "For the record, I am secure enough in our relationship that your having psychic dreams about your ex boyfriend does not bother me... but it still sucks."

Elena: "I love you. We're going to save Stefan and... I'm still going to love you."

They kiss and just then Sheriff Forbes calls Damon "We found something." There was nothing in the quarry but a few miles away they found a safe. They hadn't opened it yet because they figured if Stefan was locked in there for three months he's going to be hungry. They unlock it and find not Stefan, but a dead and bloody!

 "You're right, he was hungry," says Damon. "I bet he still is."

Dun... dun... dunnnnn....

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